What can I say about my entry into motherhood? About my little person who has made my heart grow three sizes? About how seeing my husband become a daddy has made me fall in love with him all over again?
Too much, and not enough.
I see the world differently now. I see it for all the ways it can cause harm to my little boy, but also for all the wonders it has to offer as he experiences them with fresh eyes and an open heart.
I have never been so utterly NEEDED before becoming a mother. It is exhausting and wonderful to be this child's main source of comfort. It is a burden and a privilege to be the one he reaches his little arms out to when he is hurt, or sad, or scared, or even excited.
I have learned that I am stronger than I ever realized, and weaker than I could have thought possible. I pushed a human out of my body, but it causes me unbearable pain to hear that little human cry. I have endured sleepless nights and bodily fluids, but being away from my son sparks an almost overwhelming sense of loneliness.
As I reflect on this past year, I see that motherhood is a series of contradictions. Messy, yet beautiful. Difficult, yet it comes so naturally. Tiring, yet energizing. And I won't wish away a single second.
Too much, and not enough.
I see the world differently now. I see it for all the ways it can cause harm to my little boy, but also for all the wonders it has to offer as he experiences them with fresh eyes and an open heart.
I have never been so utterly NEEDED before becoming a mother. It is exhausting and wonderful to be this child's main source of comfort. It is a burden and a privilege to be the one he reaches his little arms out to when he is hurt, or sad, or scared, or even excited.
I have learned that I am stronger than I ever realized, and weaker than I could have thought possible. I pushed a human out of my body, but it causes me unbearable pain to hear that little human cry. I have endured sleepless nights and bodily fluids, but being away from my son sparks an almost overwhelming sense of loneliness.
As I reflect on this past year, I see that motherhood is a series of contradictions. Messy, yet beautiful. Difficult, yet it comes so naturally. Tiring, yet energizing. And I won't wish away a single second.
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